The Peacemaker

The life of a peacemaker is seldom rewarding and often painful. There are people who live life in ways that cause havoc and heartache and there are people that try to keep the pieces together. I am now and have forever been a peacemaker. I prefer to not cause or deal with conflict and work hard to avert the problems. Growing up, my family stood together and always had each others back. Blood is thicker than water was more than just a saying at our place. Being thoughtful before you speak and never being too proud to say you are sorry were common teachings as well. One thing I have never been able to get a grip on is the lack of consistency in relationships since I left the home of my parents. No one seems to be able to simply exist and assume the best when dealing with the people that they love. I am an artistic person and my mediums are music and the written word. In my early dating time frame of my wife, I was often moved and inspired to write songs for her. The truly odd thing is that although I am a rock and metal fan, the songs had more of a folk sound to them. I keep most of these songs locked in the mental vault and it's been many years since I have written any new material or been inspired. One morning, I woke up and felt very musical and could remember each song. The plan was to travel to church and then return and put the songs either on paper but maybe even on the computer or recorded media. After church, the wife made a statement and I thought out loud and voiced a contrary opinion. I endured a verbal barrage of epic proportions and all of the wind left my sails. I have yet to regain the inspiration that I had felt. I posted a short note saying that some people have the unique ability to take you from happy to crappy in 2.1 seconds. There is noway to be a self peacemaker. When dealing with kids, I have always tried to bring the peace to our household. Many times I have put myself in between the kids or the kids and the wife and made a play for a peaceful resolution. The assumption has always been that  family just understands that I always have their best interest at heart and I would lay my life down for them to have a better one. Conflict seems to be inevitable and hurt feelings will flow from time to time. If we could ever learn to reserve the verbal warfare and stress for the battles that are dire in our lives, we would be better off for it. If your wife has a set schedule of spending a few hours per week working out or shopping or eating with some female friends and the kids are covered and the schedule does not interfere with the budget or responsibilities, there should never be a point that you decide to complain or cause conflict. The schedule is established and you should be happy that she has found something that makes her happy and brings her joy and you should also be awarded the same opportunity to have similar activities. The problem comes when one party becomes jealous of the other having a stress reliever or enjoying the company of friends. To exist peacefully on set schedules and then cause conflict when nothing has changed is a recipe for disaster. Not to say that any personality trait is superior to another but this writing is just an expression of the role and thoughts of one peacemaker. I conclude further that for the above reasons, I care much and my personality and drive lead me into Liberal and Progressive paths for the exterior of humanity.

TSDB